also i attempted pineapple up-side down cake a month ago that took so much more effort and turned out to be un palatable beyond belief. cardinal sin to put even a tinie winie bit in the mooh. even a dying child in west africa would choose death over the cake. bad eg. sorry. peace. but i am putting the pic for posterity. recognise the effort albeit from a distance:)

apne pe ehsaan karen. shakal pe mat jaaye!

‘STUFFED ZUCCHINI CAPERS’

A GOOD LOOKING MOUTHFUL STARTER (CAN SERVE TWO HUNGRY LOVERS to shut their mouth up thus putting a stop to jealousificating the rest of the population in the restaurant)

Ingredients: One medium sized zucchini (if u have lost me already, then pls move onto another post:)), a spoonful of dry herbs namely thyme/rosemary/oregano, abundant oil oil, philadelphia cheese (yummmm), pepper, salt, and yeah toothpick.

Procedure: Using skill of a carpenter or a stylish slicer, slice thin leaves along the length of the zucchini. u shud get around 6-8 slices.in a microwaveable tray, arrange these and throw in copious potion of olive oil. sprinkle the aforementioned herbs and salt for flavour. let it bake/grill for some 10min. in the mean while, mix a small katori full of philadelphia cheese with pepper and salt ( i also threw in 2 pieces of finely chopped sun dried tomatoes for the extra zing:)). so now u hv a thick paste filling ready. once the zucchini is ready, roll it using tender fingers and in the central hollow, stuff a lil of the cheese paste. poke the toothpick to hold the shape together. and the mouth watering ultra polished starter is all ready for consumption!

‘BURNT COCONUT MACARONS’

WORLD’S MOST EASIEST, FASTEST, TASTIEST DESSERT: mix milk maid in dry coconut powder such that it just about hold the mixture together. dont overdo it pls. and make small random shapes and bake it for 10min! Thats it!! Means it beats jelly or custard also!

Shimoga- “the divine place”
i was super curious to see the exact spot where guruji discovered sudarshan kriya that has and continues to touch and transform the lives of millions worldwide.
my buddy and i, were dropped off some 2kms from the exact spot and were asked to walk. frankly, i dint expect the place to be fancy or anything, and the path we were asked to take, seemed rather random and mildly put, ultra boring. so my expectations further took a giant negative leap. little did i know, that 100 footsteps later, my eyes would pop out at the desperate magnificent gorgeousness.:) an unexplainably beautiful river held our gaze, interspersed with lush green hills. the clouds up there were warming themselves with the tender rays of the sun. the landscape solidified something within. a small shiva temple right at the edge of a portion of the river, was where guruji had gone into silence for 10 days and got the sudarshan kriya! today, the spot is very appropriately named ‘the divine place’. just reestablished the truth that guruji only chooses the best; both, people and places:)
Best time to visit: righ now!:)

Florence: my mind was disintegrating and for the 1st time (and the only time) i had labelled myself ‘depressed’. this was on my family trip to europe where thomas cook boasted of taking us to the maximum countries in minimum time. this concept can only sell in india i tell u!
anyway, coming back to my depression. florence, one among those 97675894 countries that was covered, did wonders to my then-achy breaky heart. filled with art, ice cream and cycles; the dainty houses with its self engrossed inhabitants; bustling with activity with undertones of tranquillity, i am sure i belonged to this place some life times ago. i instantly felt at home, sorted.
Best time to visit: April-July, i like the weather ‘sunny side up’ u see;). if u are into snow (yuk!) then u could even go off during christmas.

2. Kapu Light House
This quiet beach is some half hour by bus from Udupi, Karnataka.
Mostly virgin (if that’s a possibility:)) and supremely rocky, the view from the petite light house at Kapu is elevating. The view from the top consists of the orange sun and the magnanimous sea on one side and a never ending stretch of rock & sand beach bordered by palm/coconut trees on the other. Means you have no idea. 7-course meal for the soul! Infact if you stay on till little later in the evening, you can see the light house’s light rays rotating and attacking the deep blue sky much like a ghost movie:). By the way, even the walk to the beach through a pseudo village is pleasurable if you have less or hand-picked company.
Best time to visit: 4pm-5pm, on any not-so-hot-day.

3. Boat ride in the Ganga at Varanasi
Now at the cost of sounding very show-offy I confess that I have been to some real cool countries including Switzerland with its Lake Lucerne (holy shrine to all Bollywood romantic lake view songs) and Italy which houses Venice. Venice is allegedly the most romantic place in the history of all romantic places offering hot Italian singer as boatsman who rows you and your soul mate slowly around the place. They even have a specific bridge under which you are expected to exchange saliva:). But I say, once your done playing with the little ones, then you come to their mommy! Voila! A boat ride in the ganga at varanasi. Oh my lord! The personality of ganga in varanasi is serene and poised as opposed to her ferocity and flamboyance when she’s housed in haridwar-rishikesh. and here’s an interesting ‘did-u-know’- though the ganga flows from north to south; in varanasi alone, her direction changes and she flows northwards!
It was a near full moon, a day before guru poornima, 7ish in the evening, and we sailed from assi ghat to dhasashwamedh ghat where the evening aarthi is a sight to behold. while the boatsman gently rowed, i saw families performing the last rights of their loved ones on one of the ghats; and in another, people lighting diyas and letting it go in the ganga perhaps with a secret wish in their heart. Background score to the enchanting surroundings was provided by this co-sailor singing melodies on his guitar. i thought to myself, this is how god must be watching the show…the colorful little game we call life.
Best time to visit: full moon nights, 6pm onwards.

6.30pm

6.40pm

7pm

..to be contd.

HARIDWAR:
-hoshiyar puri wala’s paneer parantha+lassi=power of ganga (minus the uric acid in all its forms, whisked in it)
-hoshiyar puri wala rocks.
-ayi hai!! yumm hoshiyar puri wala mannnn!!
-i want to marry hoshiyar puri wala and become hoshiyar puri wali!! brilliance. lassi!! ohho! *drool*

TRAIN FROM HARIDWAR TO VARANASI:
-sat in waiting area in station 1st time ever. violet-sari-clad-care-taker aunty did life story process with me. 4 kids, dead husband, expressionless face. i suggested remarriage. to this, she gave me some tips on living. one of which was “u can be with 10 men, but if you are not happy, then it is not going to help”. ok boss! if u say so! just an after thought lady..how do u know? naughty, naughty!;)
-all bihari men and women speak loud n clear with the exact same accent as laalu prasad yadav! i thought he was over doing it. but he’s being utterly natural!

VARANASI:
-varanasi weather is only fit for jaadu of koi mil gaya who is powered by heat rays. others need to install a/c in their chest region.
-guruji’s grand parents prayed before the birth of guruji’s mother at the vishalakshi temple here. hence her name. so the secret to getting to meet guruji anytime is by telling the lah-di-dah security/secretaries “banaras ke vishalakshi temple ka prasad layen hai”. its been tried and tested several times, sources say. *shhhh & high five;)*
-the high trebled,soaringly high decibel wale car horns sent chills down my spine. they were redudantly bajaoed every 3 seconds.
-the gems that are collected by guruji and polished exotically by rajesh jagasia. some of them i got to spend short but quality time with; hemant, himanshu, rishi, amod, madhav. they were like little gurujis who made our time in banaras magical.
-moon lit, row boat during sunset in ganga along the ghats, with a guitar is 108% more romantic than venice. (i have been to venice in physical form, i mean over and above travel and living)

GARIBRATH FROM VARANASI TO DELHI:
-garib rath is truly garib with dead rat aroma and 17 inch wide bed.
-bihar kid boy ran around calling out his sister “dhanno” effortlessly in sholay fashion.

FOOT NOTE:
I had the choicest of travel companions in kulpreet and anjali. their palpable love and infinite tolerance was so precious. small things, like the way they uttered ‘didi’, just the lovelorn texture to that was so endearing.. some relationships go beyond labels. i guess the 3 of us just wove something to that effect, around each other, through what we playfully called our crazy beautiful “navratri” trip! FYI: total trip cost= Rs.6500/-
On hindsight, i just became conscious of the fact that; my mind, heart and words was filled with guruji to the brim, all of 9 days, through and through.
Precious, precious times these.
Jai guru dev!
Happy gurupoornima!!

RISHIKESH:
-oh la la: the yoga loving foreigner who has been here since 2 yrs and known to all rikshaw walas who give her a free ride once in a while cos she only walks
-it is sooo hot, yet ganga is sooo cold. ganga is so peaceful yet so ferocious. personification of a perfect gorgeous and powerful woman.
-at the parmarth ashram reception for stay, i said i am from the art of living ashram etc. etc. so among the 1st few questions asked mockingly by a pseudo meditator sevak was, “kundalini jagrut hui hai kya ab tak?”…. and because i am me, “hum tho kabke uske parey jaa chuke hai”
his response to that : silence.
-very very very eerie post 10pm
-2 pigs and 2 rainbows simulatenously
-spoke to random people here, sadly haven’t come across even one obvious spiritual seeker in the past 90 hours. i am forced to believe that this place is thickly populated with DBs & GBs (dhongi baba’s and gaanja babes)
-pancake served with curd in madras cafe

HARIDWAR:
-fun valley, an amusement park in haridwar road, in ‘technical’ collaboration with essel world with the coolest ride named ‘fresse bee’ (i will be happily surprised if essel world even know’s of its existence:))
-the tune of “didi tera devar diwana, hai ram kudiyon ko daale daana” replaced with soulful lyrics “hariiii-dwaar ke gangaa me nahaanaa; tann aur mann, ko paavann kar jaana” WITH a video to this effect.
(E.P.I.C.L.O.L.)
-women with deep purple lipstick, batua near heart region (READ: left part of blouse) and tambaaku packet and chuna in right part of blouse.YUK.

DELHI AIRPORT:
-Accented english announcements! ooooh.
-Ugly geometric designs on potty colored airport carpet.
-Immaculately arranged trolleys every one feet apart along the baggage belts
-Blown up disgusting picture of pseudo desi urban naari outside ladies toilet. well, to indicate in a ghastly manner that only ( and only) women enter this detox zone.

THE DAY IN DELHI:
-Delhi Meru cab GPRS starts and ends with a SQEAKY 30 second ad about some crunchy random brand of chocolates.
-Delhi cycle rickshaw’s have real corny names (just like trucks in kerala, horses in matheran and people in america).
-Stayed in an ancient sindhi house with beedi smoking kohl eyed grandma, wakao!

SHATABDI FROM DELHI TO AMRITSAR:
-New delhi railway station had motor bikes clothed with gunny bags.
-Morning tea menu printed (waste of paper some may say!) which lists the contents of tray namely; creamer, sugar, tea bag, napkin etc. with the amount mentioned in GRAMS! Really, the word ‘TEA’ and thereby its ingredients and weight, one thinks, is intrinsic. the visually explicit support proved to make for good sunrise humor (which is a big deal considering the grumpy non-morning person that i am)
-Jet wings is passe, ‘rail bandhu’ is the new shizz; Himalaya water bye bye, ‘rail neer’ welcome!

AMRITSAR-GOLDEN TEMPLE COMMON HALL (note for future ref: very scary)
-2.45AM (phone there)…..3AM(phone where???!!!???) I had kept guruji’s book next to phone thinking guruji will use super powers to blind any chor who dared to touch my bright yellow corby. but guruji thought the chor deserved it more than me, and i deserved better. blackberry perhaps;) Fair enough.

WAGHA BORDER (omg)
-water selling boy: “desh bhakti ke geeth honge, naach gaana hoga”
me: “desh bhakti geet? kyoon bhai?”
water boy: “saamne pakisthan hai, yeh sab to karna padega”
me: *hmph*
-1hr desh bhakti show had wide spectrum of music ranging from infra red jai ho to ultra sonic chak de (& koi kahe, kehta rahe- had the dil chahta hai team known of the future proceedings, they would have atleast worn orange white green clothes). thankfully, REMIXED ‘yeh desh hai veer javano ka’ was also in the play list. semi urban, rural, and foreigners danced away. 10,000 indians and 5000 pakisthanis watched in disbelief.
- 18 something, orange bling turbaned sardar was mentally auditioning for JUST DANCE at sarhad. I mentally gave him a slap and a HR band ofcourse.
-Ostensibly, the most tense border in the world, the indo-pak retreat march pre-ceremony left me with a feeling of i-dont-know-what. embarrassment? pride? both? i am still to learn.

AMRITSAR
-Bittu di hatti (replace bittu with ur pet name for personal effect. hatti means dukaan)
-Bhrawan da dhaba
-Pio (flavoured milk)

it is such an honour to share the same breathing space as him. i have mostly been inspired by the body of work done by people nearly double my age, eg. bawa, dinesh dada, kashi bhaiyya, vikram hazra, rishi nityapragya, vishwas bhaiyya among other art of living greats. (my fingers will be secretly chopped for the ‘age’ part of the comment;)).

i have been easily convincing myself of my ok-like performance in the path by comparing myself with such people. this is because i have been safely blaming it on the fact that unlike me, they have been nearly brought up by guruji who is like a godfather showering immense physical time and affection on them from time immemorial.

each having done some 50+ advance courses (lot of it conducted by guruji himself), they are among those who have gotten to spend countless satsangs in sumeru with just 20 other people ( i am told guruji danced everyday!) , in times where guruji cooked and served them food frequently, where the videos we watch on ashtavakra geeta were shot with them listening to it like a story telling session, when he told them that there will be a huge cake shaped structure (today our vishalakshi mandap) and it will be full of people on day 1 and the listeners thought he was imagining wild, where they massaged guruji while they put him to sleep… basically providing enough and more reasons for me and you to burn in a green ocean of jealousy.

but how do u explain this guy, mister avinash tiku, who is very much my age, and has gotten the same exact training, love, guidance from the above mentioned greats as much as i have, and gets to experience guruji in satsangs of thousands just like me, waits for hours and hours just like i do, to catch a glimpse of guruji who waves, blinks and smilingly cruises past in approx. 3 seconds;

yet this genius of a boy, brings about crazy obscene levels of transformation in the lives of many! many indians (mostly north indians;) and specifically kattar punjabis;) and now he has gone international and been a role model for youth in bulgaria, europe. 9 YES!+ courses, the last one of 60 people organized in 4 days, a dance and yoga festival of 900 youth, daily group sadhana and guru pooja with 20, 50 to come for navaratri in india and 100 to berlin’s world culture festival, and to top it there were 30 of them wailing like babies when he left the airport there to come back to india- all this in a matter of 3 months. i know numbers don’t matter to the guru and so shouldn’t matter to me; however these numbers only elevate!

when i talk to him, it is beyond competition, it is reverence!
he fills my heart with a purpose.
he fills the rest of me with a zeal to serve as much as i can, as soon as possible.
all this just goes on to prove that finding hooks is the sign of a crook;)
so today, i formally, publicly kill the crook in me and safely assume that i am as equipped and blessed as the older lot.
i feel so proud that i get to continue watering the seeds they have sown so gracefully to spread India’s rich spiritual knowledge with first, indians-in-the-blind and then of course to our world citizens!
i have said this before and will say it again; if each of the shishyas are so inspirational, god knows what the guru is made up of!

avinash paaji, tumne tho hamaara dil bhar diya aur aankhen khol di!
tum purush hi nahi.. maha purush ho, maha purush! ;)
you are a gift to this planet buddy.
R.E.S.P.E.C.T

often, i invited the black brethren to climb over my hand and enjoyed them scoot enthusiastically all over. the slight ting-a-ling that my skin felt was pleasing. after many years of ignoring these tiny living beings, yesterday to my surprise i saw a black ant scurring over my fingers. as if in some majoy hurry to achieve something. it fell off a few times. but each time i would gently guide it onto my hand and let it get back to urgently running that secret errand. this went on for a few minutes.

abruptly, my mind concocted a metaphor. (statutory warning: from here on, this post gets a touch too insightful and heavy, so if u wish to skip the rest and jump to the cute joke in the end, i seriously wont take offence.)

so, this whole scene seemed like we are akin to the ants for a guru (here: hand). we seem to be so involved in acquiring things whether material or spiritual while the guru watches the show, thoroughly amused! “what are they really upto!” must be the only thought that must go on in a guru’s head watching us all so anesthetized in living it up, so to speak.

and once in a while, when we fall; knowing fully well that it is all a game, he gently picks us up and lets us carry on with what we think is supremely important. he can simply choose to crush us when he feels like.. to free us from this illusion but he lets us be and participate in it fully; incessantly keeping a loving, watchful eye on us.

the ants world, though seems tiring, also seems futile to us because we can see the larger picture. perhaps, our life is no less tiring and/or futile than an ants’ in the realm of this vast consciousness.

this knowledge that we constitute- smaller than the smallest (w.r.t the consciousness) makes me realise the futility of the gamut of emotions i am driven by, and; this truth that we simultaneously embody- bigger than the biggest (w.r.t the ant) makes me feel responsible for my actions and powerful enough to make a difference.

the cutest ant joke ever:

Q. How to kill an ant?
(asked in exam for 5 marks)

Ans. Student:- mix chilli powder with sugar & keep it outside the ant hill.
after eating it, ant will search for water. when it reaches near the water tank, push ant into it.
now ant will go to dry itself near the fire. when it reaches near the fire, put a bomb in to the fire.
then you admit the wounded ant in ICU. in the ICU remove oxygen mask from its mouth & kill the ant.

for effect, i am putting up the screen shot;)
enjaaaaaai.

these are few of the shareworthy facts of this eccentric person i am certain i know from lifetimes. other facts are lil’ below the belt. so i shall pass;)

Presenting the writer of the week- misterrrr eben felix.tadaaaa!

Click on the EBY tab in the menu section to read his potions of ambrosia.